Lake Norman

It is a scene of tranquility and then the candy-apple red speedboat comes ripping by, like a Mazda MX-5 Miata convertible, a gentleman in the grips of a mid-life crisis, wearing it out as the weekend settles in. The coterie of characters out on the lake are as eclectic as the diners at brunch at the AmoCafe. Everyone is out there for their own reasons, relaxing, searching for the optimal fishing spots, attempting to break the sound barrier, escaping the nagging spouse with the weekend all planned out that includes everything except watching the ballgame.

I used to live on the Pacific Ocean in Long Beach, California, we would take the boat out and it was fine until you got out past the breakwater and the boat would begin rolling back and forth and the stomach would turn over and the morning’s sausage and egg burrito were certain to become breakfast for the fish. That is part of what is such a beautiful thing about sailing out on Lake Norman, cascading over the gentle ripples of the cool water, gliding as if in a G102 Astir through the clouds. Oh yeah, and there are no sharks ... supposedly!

The biggest trick is not getting too comfortable and losing your focus and then finding yourself suddenly propelled from the craft with a sudden change in the wind as the boom comes whipping across the deck like a silent slap. And God forbid there is a craft of pretty girls nearby with their phones at the ready to record your mishap for posterity on TikTok, the slow-mo of you being manhandled into the water to thumping music of Blackpink. Suffice to say, there is a learning curve to the art of sailing. If Einstein can do it, anyone can! There are numerous ways to become part of the sailing community including texting and driving off Williamson Road Bridge or better yet, joining the “Lake Norman Yacht Club,” a sailor’s paradise that provides opportunities for recreational and competitive sailing for both adults and kids. They hold regattas all at a reasonable cost for membership for you to explore your inner water sign, challenge the open water of the Lake, outrun good ole Normie and not humiliate yourself going aground on the rocks while the patrons of Eddie’s cheer and throw lemons at you.

And for those with an adventurous spirit, after sailing all day and then dock and camp under the stars. The sailboat gently rocking nearby as you lean back warming your feet on a campfire, roasting brats, and sipping beer, telling stories about the day’s events sailing and all the crazy things you did and the giant garfish you nearly caught and weird shadows that may or may not have appeared beneath your boat. As the night wears on and the empty bottles and cans no longer make it into the garbage bag, the stories become grand, both today’s wildness out on the lake and every weekend you can remember. Everything that happened was so real and righteous and everyone is trying to top the other’s story. Once the moon is even too tired to stay up you crawl back onto the sailboat and drift off to sleep on your makeshift waterbed.

Come morning you realize that it is still the weekend and with cottonmouth and squinting eyes you make your way over to Clutch coffee for a pick-me-up and it is right back out on the lake, maybe this time you can bring a date for a romantic sailing tour of one of the most beautiful locations on earth, and who knows, you might even get a kiss.